Monthly Archives: December 2015

Not Your Father’s Society

[Virtual interview June 6, 2037 between Steve Smith, executive editor of ‘Quantum Systems Review’, and Jack Roberts president of the ‘American Association of Certified Analytics Professionals’ (AACAP).]

“Jack, I understand that you have an announcement.”

“That’s right Steve; we are announcing a name expansion.”

“Name expansion?”

“Yes, we are simply adding the word accounting between analytics and professionals. Our new acronym will be AACAAP; so you just have to stretch-out the last ‘a’ sound.”


“You know: AAC-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-P.”

“Why the change?”

“Well, with the introduction of stat-chips, and the collapse of big-data, the market for analytics professionals dried-up, so we decided to pivot.”


“Ever since the financial crisis of 2031 was caused by sixth generation derivatives, the large banks have been desperate to find people who could understand them, and as a result, the analytics accounting market has become red-hot. Since we weren’t getting the growth we were looking for with analytics, we decided to jump on the analytics accounting band-wagon.”

“But, what about your members?”

“What about them? We have moved on; they should too. Listen Steve, we’re taking a leadership position in the non-profit space: we believe lifetime membership in a professional society, like lifetime employment, is passe′.”

“I’m not sure I…”

“It’s been great chatting with you Steve, but I have to run. I have a meeting with Professor Teresa Laporte, the well known author of ‘Winning With Analytics Accounting’; She has agreed to serve on our certification board, and I can’t be late.”

“And remember, the acronym is AAC-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-P.”